In all the years I’ve been blogging, I don’t think I’ve ever come across a blogger who openly says they smoke. Maybe I’ve seen the odd picture of someone with a cigarette in their hand but I can’t remember ever reading a blog post about the taboo subject.
As bloggers, we all have a responsibility to uphold and I really do understand that but I’m not going to the hide the fact I’m a smoker. I know my actions can have an influence on people (albeit a tiny weeny one), hence why I’ve never openly spoken about my addiction but we’re not all perfect and I want to be completely honest on here.
For those of you interested, which is probably close to nobody, I started smoking when I was 15 because I thought it was cool. There, I said it… Teenage Katy thought it was a great look to have a fag hanging out her mouth half the time and get told off by teachers at school for stinking of smoke. I’m pretty sure that’s why most of my friends started smoking as well which is just insane but it’s what clueless teenagers do right? My friend and I used to get the boys in the older years to buy us a 20 pack of Malboro Gold (which was £7 back in the day) because how else would you be able to get your hands on cigs?
By the age of 16 I was smoking every day and disguising my smell with a couple of Smints and squirt of Ghost before I got home to my very anti-smoking mum. Shortly after that came the detentions for getting caught smoking in the graveyard and meetings with the headteacher but as a normal 18 year old would, I carried on.
Fast forward to now and at the age of 22, I know the dangers of it and that it’s not ‘cool’ at any age. I’ve tried giving up several times using nicotine patches, microtabs and gum but always resort to a fag after a stressful day at work or after I’ve had a couple of beers. It doesn’t help that all of my friends smoke as well! But don’t get me wrong, I’ve dramatically cut down and can even go a day without a cig which might seem like nothing to a non-smoker but it does require a lot of effort!
So this is a pointless post to say yes, I smoke, yes, I know the effects, yes, I know I can have an influence on people but no, it’s not right and no, I’m not proud of it. I don’t encourage nor coax the habit and I know it’s possible to quit but at the moment, I find it difficult to go a few days without a cigarette. Trust me, on those days I go to the gym, I can really feel the effects of years of smoking as I struggle to run on the cross-trainer for longer than five minutes but I’m not in denial about it.
I just wanted to write a post to say I’m aware of me being a smoker and don’t intend to ignore it. I know I must be 1 in 1000 who openly admit it on their blog but I’m happy to write more posts about it and when I eventually quit, talk about my struggles or tips for coping.
Is there anything you’d like me to discuss on my blog with regards to smoking?